Be A Beautiful Snowflake

Did you know that no two snowflakes are the same? God, in his infinite wisdom created each individual snowflake with its own signature that compound to fill the beautiful snow that we get to experience here in the North Country. We finally experienced our first decent snowstorm and it’s so soothing for me to watch. It really had me thinking God’s amazing design for this Earth and for us.

God doesn’t make mistakes. And He didn’t make a mistake with me or you either.

“I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works, my soul knows it very well.” ~ Psalm 139:14

I’ve always been somewhat of a people pleaser and i’ve always been so hurt when people don’t like me or approve of me, but over the years I’ve learned the hard lesson of being myself no matter what. Deep down I’ve often wondered what my parents would think, what friends and family will talk about behind my back, or how people will judge me for certain things that I do.

That’s certainly not fun and it’s no way to spend your life. Becoming a Mom myself changed so many things about me (as it should). I often reflect on how I’m living and examine it through their eyes. Am I demonstrating behavior that I want them to replicate and showing them a healthy way of living? I love my children for who they are and who God has destined them to be, not who I picture they’ll be. But I never want them to constantly stress about what others think so I need to be the example.

If you live trying to please others or change for who you’re dating, what your parents want (As an adult), what a “friend” wants then the world is missing out on someone truly amazing! You’re never going to be everyone’s cup of tea and that’s okay!

Most people hate the cold and the snow, but we LOVE it. A lot of people hate tattoos, and we love them. I’m sure people disagree with aspects of our parenting, my political beliefs, my sports teams, etc. In the words of Rachel Hollis in Girl, Wash Your Face, “Someone else’s opinion of you is none of your business!”

If people sit and listen to gossip about you (especially without defending you), those are not your people. If they hate the core of who you are, they are not your people. If they don’t care whether or not they miss out on important events in your life or if the relationship is always one-sided, they are not your people. If they don’t care about hurting you, not your people either. Surround yourself with those who love the raw, real you no matter what!

Now, I’m not one of those who believes that if it’s not harming others then it’s okay. As a Christian the Bible is my guide. My spiritual leadership aids in this. And, as a wife, my husband is my other half and I submit to Him as the leader of our household.

Life is too short. And the world deserves ME. Not a filtered chameleon.

Update from the NORTH Country

TeamGrim is wrapping up one of the craziest months we’ve ever had (and that’s saying a lot)! It started with Ryan’s graduation from flight school (more to come on that later), continued with a 1400 mile PCS from Ft. Rucker, Alabama to Ft. Drum, NY, and then we threw in Christmas with some snow!

We’ve been in our house now for 3 weeks and are already LOVING our new duty station. We’ve wanted to get back to the North since we were married and we are FINALLY here. Moving is one of my favorite benefits in the military life, but this one was a bit more intense that we expected. Turns out that two crazy weeks of packing, driving, stops, colds, and making a new house a home takes its toll on toddlers.

Logan and Emma are old pros with road trips and PCS/change as Army brats. Overall, they did amazing! But it was still a lot to take in when you’re not even 2 1/2.

We’ve had a few little snow storms with a couple of inches each to play in, we saw Santa come in from Canada to Sackets Harbor, attended a Watertown Wolves hockey game, saw Disney on Ice in Syracuse, and celebrated Christmas & New Year’s already!

We’re still working on getting 100% settled and enjoying having Daddy home on PCS leave with us. We have a lot more adventure and challenges headed our way in 2019, but we are anxious for all that is to come!

Thanks for following along on our journey!

~Melissa G.

Embracing the Army (PCS) Journey

PCS + Christmas + Flight School Graduation = a whole lot of insanity fun!!

My motto since Ryan’s first 1 year deployment in 2011-2012 (and tattooed on the inside of my wrist) has been “Embrace the Journey”.  it’s my reminder to stop worrying about the future, stressing about the present and letting go of the past.  This has been a necessity as an Army wife and even more so as a flight school spouse.  I have to live in the present!

As Ryan’s journey through flight school progressed and he wasn’t afforded any breaks (the Army is cutting down the “bubbles” between instructional sections in order to push students through faster to get them to their units due to a severe shortage of pilots), it was my hope to not PCS at Christmas.   (For those unfamiliar with military acronyms, a PCS is a Permanent Change of Station or as permanent of a move as you can have in the military).  Well, it’s been said to never tell the Army your plans!  The Army and God definitely have a sense of humor!

Never tell the Army your plans!

I’m probably a weird one, but PCS-ing is one of my favorite aspects of being married to a soldier.  I grew up as an Army BRAT and my adventurous side gets restless and needs a new home and city to explore every few years!  We’ve been trying to get back up North and to the cold/snow since Ryan entered the Army and Ft. Drum, New York is the closest he can get us to my home in Maine.  So, even though I had no desire to uproot our lives a few weeks prior to Christmas, we’re embracing all of the wonderful things this move has to offer!

  1. We get SNOW! and COLD! for Christmas 🙂
  2. TeamGrim gets to travel through 8 states (almost) on the Army’s dime.
  3. Christmas adventures in different states. 
  4. The ability to see family and friends along the way.
  5. Getting to decorate for Christmas…TWICE!!
  6. Fun stories to tell and memories to look back upon.

I’m taking this whole situation as a reminder to myself to look for the good in every aspect of life.  Duty station assignment that you don’t like?  Explore it anyway and find reasons to like it.  Deployment/extended separation?  How can I grow in my relationship with God and how can this bring me and my spouse/kids closer?  

We can either focus on the negatives all of the time or we can find reasons to be excited and to embrace the memories that we’re making.  There is a LOT of stress in this life and it’s not for the faint of heart.  I have my days that I’m not the biggest fan of the military and i’m definitely ready for retirement, but i’m so thankful for all of the opportunities that we’ve been granted that most never get.

And now, it’s almost time to #Drive2Glory!

~Melissa

My Calling

In April, I worked my last day of my career in national security/government contracting to fulfill my dream of focusing on my husband and my kids.  Long before we were married, Ryan and I discussed our joint desire to be able to reach a point of financial security to allow me to stay home with our future children.  Being a military family comes with many challenges and I wanted to be as present as possible in our children’s lives.  While I commend dual military families and those with multiple careers (seriously, that’s tough work to balance it all!), I always knew it wasn’t for me.

Often, reality can feel different from our dreams.  Since that time i’ve struggled to find my identity beyond being a wife and a mother.  We often find our self-worth within our career or chosen profession, and all of my dreams have or are coming true.  But was this enough?  Society often pushes us to “want more” for ourselves and that we should strive to have it all: the husband, the kids, the top of a corporation…and the white picket fence.  Was it okay to “just” be a wife and a mom?  Could I REALLY be the driving force behind my family?

What if it’s OKAY that my role IS to be a military spouse and a mom?  What if that is my calling and my “mission field”?  I know that God is using me to encourage and lift up/support my husband as he serves our Country.  I know that God is using me to be engaged in our children’s lives and to set the example.  And I know that He is going to use me to pour back into the lives of other military spouses and families.  How will my mindset change and what more can I do if I transform my thoughts into THIS being my calling?  God has called my heart since I was a young girl and wanted to marry a soldier and to stay in the only life I ever knew.

What if it’s OKAY that my role IS to be a military spouse and a mom?

I’ve recently joined a book discussion group with a friend that started it in her home and we are diving into the book “Wife of a Soldier, a Journey of Faith” and today I had the great pleasure of meeting the author.  It’s been speaking to my heart and I highly recommend reading it, no matter your situation as a military spouse.  Diana Jeurgens describes how God has called each of us to this role for a reason.  It’s no mistake that I grew up wanting this life, that I married Ryan, that these kids were given to us to raise.

This military life can be exciting and stressful, lonely and friendly…it’s all in how we view it.  I know that i’ll still be human and have my moments that I hate the separations, deployments, and LATE duty nights…but oh, what a wonderful life this can be as well!

I’m not sure what the distant future holds for our family, but i’m so excited to serve God where He’s placed me for this season.  My husband has a very difficult role to play and I know that God has called me to be his supporter and to take care of our life on the home front.   I’m anxious to arrive at our next duty station in New York and I already feel led to a few areas of opportunity!

Melissa G.

PCS Organization

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I’ll be the first to admit that I struggle with organization and it’s never come easy for me.  However, there are two times where my life is dress right dress: tax season and PCS time!

Moving at any point, much less with the military, can be chaotic and stressful; every little thing you can do to combat that is important!

I’ve kept a PCS binder on hand since our first move from Ft. Bragg to HAAF which has made it easier for other PCS’s.  All I have to do is purge the unnecessary info (which gets scanned and stored on the server, because i’m slightly a nerd) and update information that’s changed.  I also pull out the important docs that stay filed in locked fireproof boxes.  Now that we’ve added two kids and a dog since that first move, the included items have shifted a bit.

Below i’ve included a list of items that we’ve found to be beneficial for our family.  Bear in mind, my husband keeps his own storage clipboard with his necessary documents for in-processing so I haven’t listed those here.

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  1. Important documents: Socials, Passports, etc.  I also keep a clear pocket for receipts/loose documents.
  2. Local Info: Details about the installation and local area that we’ve found.
  3. Birth/Marriage Certificates
  4. Insurance Information
  5. Government PCS Rate/Compensation Info.
  6. Drum Housing Info & Paperwork.
  7. Outgoing Housing CHecklists, etc.
  8. Kids’ Vaccinations & Records (You could also carry hard copies of any necessary prescriptions until you get established).
  9. Pet Shot Records
  10. Notes (Loose leaf paper)

img_9172For this move i’ve also included a Do It Yourself or “DITY” checklist.  (The Army calls this a PPM now or Personally Procured Move).  There’s nothing worse than getting to a new house and realizing you have nothing to cook with!  Hopefully this will help to keep ourselves straight.

Finally, I take pictures of our furniture and electronics with serial numbers and keep the thumb drive in the binder with us for future claims.

On packing day, the kids and I mostly hang out in the “Don’t Touch Room” where we keep everything that we will be hand carrying with us.  This way we don’t have to worry about anything accidentally getting packed by the movers.

I hope this helps for your future PCS moves!  Do you have any additions that I have forgotten?

~Melissa G.

Adventures in NOLA

When we first received our orders for Ft. Rucker and Ryan was picked up for flight school we added New Orleans to our “Duty Station Bucket List”. Our time here is running out quicker than we expected and time has definitely gotten away from us, so we had to fit in a quick weekend trip over Columbus Day weekend.

Our latest camping adventure in “Roo” we checked off Mississippi and Louisiana. We stopped in MS to check out a giant oak tree across from the beach that has survived many hurricanes (including Cat 5s!) and has been there for 500 years! Friendship Oak was pretty and the kids appreciated the break up from the drive and the ability to get some of those never-ending toddler wiggles out.

I was thrilled to finally stay right on the water (which I’ve been determined to do since we bought our camper back in March) and we were very impressed with the campground. Convenience store on-site, house boats and its own restaurant (they served delicious smoked meat and jambalaya. (Pontchartrain Landing)

Downtown NOLA was a city in its very own league with so much character. Dogs are everywhere and even welcomed in the restaurants and bars, and the people were eclectic but fun. It’s a tough and resilient crowd and a blend of so many cultures. We took the kids on a carriage ride with a mule and toured the oldest above ground graveyard in America.

Finally, we were able to spend a few hours at the National WW2 Museum, which did not even do it justice. I highly recommend allowing yourself a few days to spend there if you’re a history nerd like Ryan and I are.

We’d definitely love to go back someday and possibly see Ryan’s mama’s Saints play in the Super Dome!

Check out some of our pics below:

Flight School ~ PCS ORDERS ~

The other big, important day while in flight school is the day you receive your orders for your follow-on duty station!  The aviators are allowed to maintain a list of the Top 3 places that they would like to go, and the Army (most of the time) attempts to grant it to you and your family.  As with anything in the Army, nothing is guaranteed, and it’s both exciting and nerve-wracking waiting for these to come through!

“They say” can often get you into trouble and for us it did.  We were told an average of 4-6 weeks from selection he’d receive the draft of his orders telling him where we’d be sent next.  4-6 weeks turned into 7, then 8….then the rest of his class (all but Ryan and 1 other) received their orders.  I’ll admit, I didn’t handle this frustration in the most graceful way!  I’ve moved around my entire life as an Army Brat turned federal contractor, turned Army wife.  Literally my first passport had my hospital birth picture.  However, we’ve been trying to get back up North for 7 years.  Ryan’s first duty station was supposed to be Alaska…then those were pulled for Ft. Bragg.  Ugh!  Our family is in Maine and New England will always be HOME, so we were so anxious to find out if our hopes would come true!

FINALLY, 9 weeks from selection and halfway through his advanced airframe training his orders came through!!

And our next duty station is….

FT DRUM, NEW YORK!!!!!!!!

Ft. Drum was our #1 choice and we were praying so hard that Ryan would get selected to go!!!!!  We are beyond excited for the next chapter of our story and to FINALLY be back closer to home.  It’s about 7 hours back to our home town in Maine which is the closest we can get.  We are so thankful for snow…and 4 seasons!

FLY TO GLORY!!!!!

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